post no.171

dear mum and dad,

i want to go on a mission trip. you know i want to, too. but you're not supportive of it. you give excuses, saying that i'm too young or that it will be during the monsoon season. i am disappointed and upset. being young is a poor excuse, for i am 16 and i find myself mature enough for it. the bible mention many young people who were called into service at a tender age. do you doubt my abilities to shine? do you think i am not capable of the task before me?

there is never a good age to go. 18 may seem ideal, but what if i dont make it for my 18th birthday? what if somewhere along the way, an accident happens, the bright future turns bleak and everything just goes wrong? if and when that happens, i dont want you to think back and regret not letting me go for the one thing i really wanted to do.

i've never been really passionate about anything; not music, not even photography. but the one thing that i am passionate about is going out there and being a blessing to the world. please do not deny me that.

i know that no matter what happens, God's will is going to prevail, despite obstacles in my way. i know that if it truly is in God's will, He will make a way when it seems impossible. that He will use this so that i can testify of just how amazing He is. i will pray and persevere. i will see His will unfold in my life.

it's sad to see that you do not encourage me in my plans, especially this one. i would think you'd be proud of me and what i want to do. i dont feel that i am not able to do it, despite being barely 16. i've been waiting to do this all my life, and i'm not gonna pass it up when the opportunity comes by. i'd go ahead and proceed with my plans if i could, except you hold my passport. i really feel like this is the right thing to do, and i dont want to give this up.

i'll be praying. and i'll be watching. i hope in His time, you'll understand.

love,
your daughter.
____________________

my hands are cold.
i need fluff.
i need someone to warm my hands and heart.
i certainly could do with some warmth now.
a hug would be plain heavenly.