its funny how i can never have a proper, nice, amazingly beautiful relationship that isnt tainted.
funny how there's always something stopping me from being really close to someone, and it almost always isnt me.
funny how this is a recurring pattern in my life.

God, are you trying to prepare me for whats ahead when you call me to be say, a missionary and send me to Africa or something?

it hurts so much though. they say it takes a loss to make you appreciate what you have. but with this, i was already cherishing every moment and appreciating it all. that just makes it harder.

BIG SIGH.

oh well.

the promise was when everything fell, we'd be held.